Feelings or emotions are like a river, they flow and change. As the term emotion suggests, it is an ‘energy in motion’.
When we are not feeling our feelings 100% completely, we will store any unfelt feelings. Just like a dam stores water.
Like water behind a dam wall, storing our feelings creates pressure. Storing feelings can also create beliefs that justify our feelings, which can then create more feelings and more pressure.
Under this pressure, we can start to behave dysfunctionally, hurting ourselves and those around us. Eventually this creates too much unhappiness and unwittingly some people choose unhealthy ways to resolve it.
One unhealthy approach is to hide from our unhappiness or feelings with substances like alcohol, drugs or tobacco.
Other unhealthy ways people try and feel happier is to do things to avoid their feelings, such as keeping themselves busy by working too much, or activities that may give them intense pleasure such as gambling or over eating, while others may create a dependence on another, such as a boyfriend or girlfriend, to distract them from their feelings.
Some people close down and try not to feel anything at all, but this tends to create trauma in their lives through accidents or illnesses.
All these attempts to secure our happiness only creates more pressure, because we are still not feeling our feelings completely. This pressure grows and our unhappiness grows, so we may drink more, work more or fight more with our partner because we feel increasingly unhappy.
Sometimes the pressure becomes so great a person metaphorically explodes.
A happier life is to feel our feelings all the time. For when we are feeling our feelings 100% completely, our unhappiness together with any stored negative feelings, will wash away, removing the pressure that drove any of our dysfunctional behavior(s).
When we are feeling our feelings completly, we create the space for our happiness.
Become interested in what you feel by regularly asking yourself ‘how do I feel?’. Talk about how you feel with others and listen when they tell you how they feel.
Truly a happier life comes when we follow our feeling, but be careful not to confuse your thinking with your feeling. Listen to your heart and allow yourself to be guided by your feeling, your inner guidance.